Whirlwind....

Where does the time go? November was a blur. I work at a veterans organization so the beginning of November was crazy in terms of my job...lots of great work to be done surrounding Veterans Day.

Just days after that, I took off for Austin, Texas, and the Convio Summit. Convio is a content management system used by non-profits (remember...I'm a website/social media geek?), and they have a conference (or summit as they call it) each year talking about product development, improved usage, etc. It was a good chunk of time for me to focus on professional growth and fresh ideas/approaches for the website/organization for which I work.

From Austin I flew to OKC to my parents' house for the Thanksgiving holiday. It was nice to have three days with my parents and just me. I looked at mom at one point and said, "This is the first time we've seen each other in 18 months that is not related to me having cancer!", which frankly was great! Chris and girls arrived on Sunday then the real whirlwind began:

• Monday: Official college visit for Mackenzie to Oklahoma State University, my alma mater...so fun!
  
• Tuesday: Open house for Oklahoma friends from high school, college, and life in general...again, so fun! Family from Texas starts to roll in...specifically the Holybees. :)
  
• Wednesday: More family rolls in including my 89-year-old Mema who is doing great...more fun!
  
• Thursday: Thanksgiving...a day of thanks and food and family. Enough said.
  
• Friday: Most family leaves, a bit of shopping, and more Mexican food.
  
• Saturday: Back to Virginia
  

NOTE: Not previously mentioned in this post, but part of the deal for us when we go to Oklahoma to visit, is for Chris to have Mexican food as much as possible. It's just better Mexican food there, people. And free tortillas before any meal at all of these delicious restaurants...doesn't happen in Virginia like that!

So that's the logistics of the trip....the emotional? Exhausted, thrilled, meloncholy, homesick (for VA and also OK), overwhelmed, happy, anxious....then back to exhausted.

You can go home again...but it's always different. Landmarks change, people change, I changed. Some of this for the better and some not.

I was glad to talk about my thyroid cancer or lack thereof with anyone who would listen. I would rather people ask me about it than people completely avoid it, which is what three family members did. I wasn't offended but...shocked? Sad? Did I look that good (ha!) that they didn't even remember it? Did they not know what to say? Just ask me how I feel, I'll show you the scar on my neck, as I'm very proud of it, tell you I'm doing well, no recurrence, and we'll move on. Anyway...still processing that.

Since returning back home to Virginia, I am more reflective of the things I should do more (like call my Mema) and more aware of the things I am appreciative of (my own bed, my dog). And for my life...it's mine. 41 years of ups and downs, challenges and wins, situations that I thought I could never overcome and did. It's not over, it's not perfect, but it's my life...

Veterans Day: November 11, 2009

Today as I drove home from a Veterans Day program at a local elementary school, I noticed something great about Vienna: the streets are lined with flags for Veterans Day. It made me proud!

Tomorrow is Veterans Day. When you work for a veterans organization as I do, it's a big deal, frankly, as it should be for all of us! I work at a great place with a great mission so I'm going to share a bit of my work, which wasn't hardly work at all, from today.

I had the opportunity to attend a Veterans Day program today and talk with kids about it. They attend a school where they place alot of emphasis on Veterans Day education, and as I listened and participated in the program, I understood: the principal is a veteran herself, and the coordinating teach is a veteran of 27 years.

I've added a link below so you can check them out. There are individual videos as well so don't miss those...

Thanks for supporting our veterans!

http://www.pva.org/site/PageServer?pagename=support_Veterans_Day_PatrickHenryES

PS: Awesome flag photo top left courtesy of Chris Steuble!

I don't like Halloween, but I'm still cancer free!

Wow, you know it's been a while since I have blogged when my kids' friends start asking when I'm going to add a blog post. I love that! OK, you've inspired me to write, Ryan and David....

So....I don't like Halloween. I don't like to be scared, don't like haunted houses, don't like horror films, don't like blood dripping from stuff or zombies or any of that stuff. When the girls were little, they dressed up as cute things like lions or cowgirls or princesses, not zombies or witches or anything like that. And really, the massive amounts of candy....one can only eat so much before vomiting occurs.

That brings us to today, which I am tolerating...going to grin and bear it. The best thing about today is that at 8 PM, my Oklahoma State Cowboys are playing the Texas Longhorns in football on national TV. Hoping for a Cowboy victory in Stillwater today. At least there's that. :)

And now for the awkward segue into cancer....

I'm almost embarassed I didn't share this on Wednesday. OK, I'll say it...I am embarassed I haven't blogged about this before now, but the ultrasound I had been worried about for weeks was on Wednesday. I had been losing sleep over this, lacked focus overall, and had already started planning my next biopsy and surgery. I prepared myself for the worst as my gut really did tell me that there was more cancer to deal with.

There wasn't any cancer to be found. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. No cancer in my lymph nodes, thyroid bed, neck, salivary glands. Wow, that's amazing! The fog lifted, and I have felt relieved ever since! After several ultrasounds in a row with bad cancer news in the past 15 months, this is now two in a row with no cancer. The next cancer follow up: January/February 2010 when I have thyrogen shots, whole body scan, etc.

Thanks to all who knew I was struggling and prayed for me. I know it helps... :)

On my soapbox about "the best cancer to have"

Those of you who follow me on Twitter know I was on my soapbox this morning after reading yet another article about the dreaded subject of how thyroid cancer is "the best cancer to have." Think about that...the best cancer? Why would someone say that?

In an attempt to make you feel better about having thyroid cancer, some health care profesionals try to convince those of us who have or have had thyroid cancer that it is "the best cancer to have" because it has a high survival rate.

An aside here, that high survival rate applies to papillary carcinoma, one of the three types of thyroid cancer out there. Survival rates are lower for medullary carcinoma and anaplastic carcinoma, the other two types of thyroid cancer.

Back on topic...OK, so tell us that papillary carcinoma has a high survival rate. Truly, that is good news. But because of this "best cancer to have" statement, and the fact that I was told my thyroidectomy would most likely be just an easy, overnight stay for me, you can imagine my shock post-surgery when I felt like my head was going to fall off, I couldn't eat real food for 7-10 days, and two of the four lymph nodes the surgeon took out of my neck were the size of small plums leaving me with some amazing pain and an extra long scar on my neck (which I now love...see old posts).

Then trying to figure out thyroid medication that I will take the rest of my life that sometimes makes me so tired I want to sleep on the floor of my office (never done this BTW) and has assisted me in gaining 20 lbs post-cancer.

And then there is the ever popular recurrence that approximately 30% of us with thyroid cancer get to deal with, which I did in January 2009.

So PLEASE....tell us the survival rates for papillary carcinoma are good, but don't tell us that it is "the best cancer to have." One of my favorite Tweeters and fellow cancer survivor said to me today in response to my Twitter soapbox rant about this: "I always reply: "then you go on & get it. let me know how awesome it is."

Neither she or I wish cancer on anyone. That's not the point. We know you have good intentions. The line about "the best cancer to have" is just not helpful....that is all.

Another twitter friend said we should endeavor to educate others that this is not a helpful statement. I hope by sharing here folks will understand and choose to say something else. Personally, I would rather hear "Wow, that stinks! You know, you're tough and can do this" than "the best cancer" line.

What are some things you could say besides thyroid cancer is "the best cancer to have"? Please comment...let's talk about this!

Getting off my soapbox now...again. :)

Recurrence on the Metro

This morning while riding on the Orange Line of the Metro, I found myself thinking about my upcoming visit to the endocrinologist next week and subsequent ultrasound of my neck. Then I started jumping to conclusions.

Dr. Pun said at my upcoming October visit, he would give me an order to get an ultrasound of my neck/thyroid area. The last one I had was in April as part of the batter of tests/scans following my January 2009 surgery to remove more cancerous lymph nodes. All of my other ultrasound prior to the April one were performed by the same physician. However, the one in April was not for some reason, even after specifying I wanted to schedule this “regular” radiologist.

My conclusion as I dwelled on this: what if he missed something. He wasn’t familiar with my case. The other radiologist was.

So I should prepare myself for the worst with this ultrasound I will schedule in October. If there is something “suspicious” on ultrasound, I will have another fine needle aspiration (FNA) biopsy, the good ol’ sticking the needle in my neck again. Hopefully I can get both of these done before my trip to Austin/OKC in November.

If it proves to have the suspicious areas that I think it will, that will put me in December in terms of timing. I don’t want to have the surgery before Christmas because that’s depressing. This actually works out well as I should put it off to January 2010 to be able to use our medical savings account again since we tapped that out in June this year.

Wait…what am I doing?! I don’t even know if there is anything suspicious in my neck much less a recurrence!

And that, my friends, is how a cancer patient/survivor thinks from time to time. The days leading up to our check-ups, check-ins, whatever you want to call a doctor’s appointment to make sure you don’t have more cancer, really just stink and are nerve wracking.

Plus, I am my grandmother’s grandchild as my mom would say. Meaning, Mema worries about everything, and so do I.

I’ll do my best to keep my mind on other things (heaven knows there’s plenty of activity at our house/with our kids to keep me busy) the next few weeks, but I can’t promise anything other than there will be good days and bad days. Hoping for mostly good ones….I like those better.

CureToday.com: With Humor and Openness

Hey, I was asked to write an article for CureToday.com!

Here's a link to the article>

Dirty Dancing with Charlie's Angels

While at the beach vacationing in North Carolina this summer, we heard the incredible news that Michael Jackson had died. It was shocking....and then this smaller, side story came to light the same day: Farrah Fawcett had died of anal cancer. To me, this was a big story as well, but we didn't hear as much about Farrah that day.

As a child in the 70s (yes, I'm actually that old), I remember my friends and I playing Charlie's Angels. Even after she was off of the show, I was mesmerized by her. I mean, after all, she married the Six Million Dollar Man, Lee Majors! And then later Ryan O'Neal, but that's a different story....

Even though she had a Lifetime movie here and there, her star was never brighter than in the 70s . However, when I heard she was battling cancer, that caught my attention. It was shortly before I found out that I had thyroid cancer when I became aware of her diagnosis and was surprised. I'm not sure why, but I was just surprised.

And then I watched "Farrah's Story" earlier this year detailing her two year+ journey and fight. Wow...such grace and strength. Then to see her without her trademark beautiful hair in the end...amazing. Her spirit was inspiring. Watch it when you get the chance if you haven't already.

It seems like it was last summer when I was first aware that Patrick Swayze had cancer. I know he had several movies that made him famous, but for me, it was his Johnny character in Dirty Dancing. The movie came out while I was a student at Oklahoma State University.

It's strange in that I wasn't such a crazy fan of his, but he symbolized my youth as did Farrah. Beautiful people who don't age....but they did. Actors who were bigger than life...but they weren't. They are diagnosed with cancer just like me.

I am grateful for the technology, doctors, and the circumstances that lead to me to becoming a cancer survivor and having more time on this earth with my family. Sad today for those who have not been able to do so.